Sacred Marriage : I

The Greatest Challenge in the World: A Call to Holiness more than Happiness.

The first chapter of this book, much like many others, is an introduction to the book's topic and basically sets the stage for the rest of the book. What stood out to me most in this chapter is our society's focus on the "quick fix" for marital or relationship problems. You've seen it - on magazine covers in the grocery store: "6 ways to have a better marriage", or on internet search engine's: "3 easy steps to a better relationship", etc. It occurred to me in this first chapter, that we are inundated with quick and easy steps - none of which seem to be long lasting or life changing. It struck me that God must have had something else in mind for marriage.

Thomas says,

"What if God didn't design marriage to be 'easier'? What if God had an end in mind that went beyond our happiness, our comfort, and our desire to be infatuated and happy as if the world were a perfect place? What if God designed marriage to make us holy more than to make us happy?"

In Christian circles the tendency is to encourage our family and friends to pray harder, or learn a few of those ever-helpful principles or techniques. This isn't to say that learning to communicate better or be more conscious of your spouse's needs; only to suggest that those things, ultimately, won't achieve the change that God wants for you, and for your marriage.

Well, I hope that you will consider thinking on those points; consider what God intends for your marriage (or impending marriage), and ask yourself this question, referring to your spouse:

"Are you going to fulfill me, or will God fulfill me?" For many, the answer will come quickly, but practically speaking, if you're like me, you'll often look for fulfillment from your spouse first. This was a challenging thought for me, I hope it is for you as well.

It's been a week....

...and I've successfully managed to avoid the "Merry Christmas" blog that always seems necessary. I DO hope that everyone had a very good, safe and relaxing Christmas (and boxing day).

I always look forward to getting books for Christmas, and I thought that I would list some of the authors that I'm excited to read this year. The first book is a book on marriage that Kristin and I are going to work through together, slowly reading and discussing (as it includes questions!) over the next few months. It's called "Sacred Marriage: What if God designed marriage to make us Holy more than to make us Happy?" by Gary Thomas.

This is not to imply that we're not happy (we are!), only to suggest that Kristin and I intend to always seek God in our lives - and we'd like to seek to honor and know God more fully through our marriage. As we work through this book, I'll be sure to drop quotes and thoughts for your encouragement.

Other authors that are "on deck" are DA Carson, CJ Mahaney, JI Packer, John Piper and RJ Foster. Should be a good year! I also hope to pick up some fiction from Dekker and/or Peretti. As always, I'll keep you posted.

I also hope to enjoy past and future editions of TableTalk and Christian Research Journal magazines!

What will you read this year?

I hope to post my reflections on Chapter 1 of Sacred Marriage in the next day or two, titled "The Greatest Challenge in the World: A Call to Holiness More Than Happiness", but in the meantime, here's a quote from WH Auden that appears at the beginning of the book.

Like everything which is not the involuntary result of fleeting emotion but the creation of time and will, any marriage, happy or unhappy, is infinitely more interesting than any romance, however passionate.

Christmas is coming....

...and the bloggers are all over it! There are countless bloggers trying to come up with something fresh - something distinct - to say about Christmas.

I'm not going to do that.


Not today at least.

Instead, I'm going to quote from a book that I'm currently reading - it's called Death by Love, written by Mark Driscoll and Gerry Breshears. I'm still a few chapters from the end, but it's a fantastic book that I would happily endorse. Read more about it here.

Here's a section, just to get you thinking.

In Christianity Lite the cross of Jesus is overlooked by people seeking a Christianity in which the objective is to gloify Self, the power to do is Self, and the means to do so are self-sufficiency, victorious living, pride, and comfort, which together commingle as a false gospel that is of no help when the dark seasons of life envelope you.

The great Reformer Martin Luther distinguished between the Christianity Lite theology of glory and the theology of the cross. The theology of glory celebrates what human beings can do based on their personal vision, self-discipline, and hard work. The theology of the cross celebrates what Jesus alone can accomplish for us, through us, with us, and in spite of us. The theology of glory seeks to know God directly in his power, wisdom, success and glory. The theology of the cross seeks to know God through the seeming weakness, folly, failure, and shame of the crucified Jesus. The theology of glory seeks to use God to avoid suffering, hardship, pain, shame, loss and failure as opportunities to grow in an understanding, appreciation, and emulation of the crucified Jesus. The theology of glory seeks to use God to obtain health and wealth. The theology of the cross seeks Jesus, even if that should mean experiencing pain and poverty like Jesus.

-- From Death By Love, by Mark Driscoll & Gerry Breshears (p.202), published by Crossway.

Ah, U.S. Presidents... what will we do with you...?

Here's some interesting reading for today...

The first is an interview with the new President-Elect, Barack Obama, regarding his views on religion. I found this fascinating. And disappointing (but not really surprising...). Check it out here.

The second, a very brief Q&A with George W. Bush on ABC News. It's just a few short questions; I would have laughed had I not been shaking my head so vigorously. Read it! It'll be on Nightline... great... ...

IrishCalvanist wrote a good reflection, read it here : link! : Some of the responses were good too.

Happy Reading!

John Milton - Paradise Lost

Everyone is blogging about John Milton today... the famous puritan author who penned Paradise Lost, a major literary work, an epic poem.

I haven't read Paradise Lost (yet!) but have wanted to do so for many years. This poem has been the inspiration for an enormous amount of writing, music and art. I'm told it's a fascinating story, and I'm eager to read it!

For now, I'm just going to quote John Piper, who wrote this brief article on his blog today. Enjoy!

Today is the 400th anniversary of the birth of one of the greatest English poets, John Milton (December 9, 1608 — November 8, 1674).

His greatest work, the epic poem Paradise Lost, was dictated between 1658 and 1664. He had become totally blind by 1654.

It begins with this prayer (to the Holy Spirit?), and covers the sweep of history from Adam to Christ:

Of Man's First Disobedience, and the Fruit
Of that Forbidden Tree, whose mortal taste
Brought Death into the World, and all our woe
With loss of Eden, till one greater Man
Restore us, and regain the blissful Seat,
Sing Heav'nly Muse...

But in spite of the magnificent scope of the epic, my favorite of all Milton's writings is the sonnet, On His Blindness. I love it all the more the older I get. You will see why.

When I consider how my light is spent
Ere half my days in this dark world and wide,
And that one talent which is death to hide
Lodg'd with me useless, though my soul more bent
To serve therewith my Maker, and present
My true account, lest he returning chide,
"Doth God exact day-labour, light denied?"
I fondly ask. But Patience, to prevent
That murmur, soon replies: "God doth not need
Either man's work or his own gifts: who best
Bear his mild yoke, they serve him best. His state
Is kingly; thousands at his bidding speed
And post o'er land and ocean without rest:
They also serve who only stand and wait."

Pause and give thanks to God for his gifts to the world like John Milton and his verse. Sometimes the blind see far better than the every-busy seers.

As a post-script: I've come across so many valuable articles recently; I haven't linked many of them, probably because I haven't figured out how to preface them all, and don't want to overwhelm people with a plethora of information (though if you're like me, you looove reading lots of articles!). I'll try to add a few this week to keep you thinking.

Little things can make a BIG difference!

This is a post I should have written a long while ago. It's been several months now since Kristin and I attended Lightway Church in the East End of our city. We've heard a lot about this church plant at Westside, and have helped out financially and practically on several occasions - but we had never actually attended a service.

So we decided it was high time we did.

Ian (one of the pastors at Lightway) and I go way back - we had ministered at camp together (I was reminded that Mark [the other pastor at Lightway] also ministered at the camp when I was there - though we knew little of each other at the time), we had also attended Heritage College together; I was comfortable going to the church because I knew them.

[As an aside: while I write this I am reminded of how difficult it is to go to a new church where you don't know anyone! I was comfortable going to this church because I had connected with someone there. If I knew no one, the experience would have been much different!!! How quickly we forget this...]

Ian and I connected immediately as Kristin and I emerged from our car in the small parking lot at Lake Avenue Public School. Ian was excited to see us; but quickly offered a warning: this was not a regular Sunday service at Lightway, and the format would be a little different.

Lightway Church was going through a series about their mission and vision for the church and their community. This week would be focused on service. The small congregation gathered around a series of circular tables, very informally (but comfortably) in a small gymnasium. I can't say that the service started "on time", I got the feeling that it started when they felt like it was time to start. The praise team led a few songs, there was corporate prayer, and then Mark and Ian led a short sermon about service, and what that looks like at Lightway.

Before I knew it, the congregation was breaking out into two groups - one group would stay inside and organize materials for a missions project - measuring and cutting fabric, and that sort of thing. The rest of us went outside to pick up garbage.

Although the playground, at first glance, didn't look overly trash-riddled, there were several spots where the wind had gathered small (and sometimes larger) piles of refuse. We spread out and quickly filled at least 10 garbage bags! We worked quickly and were done our job in about 15 or 20 minutes. The playground looked different - much improved!

I followed the group back into the school and bumped into (not literally...) the school's custodian. She had been milling around the school preparing for the onslaught of children that would flood the halls the following morning. She instantly saw the mound of black bags piled near a dumpster and was amazed.

The custodian asked me, "Why did you guys do all this?", I responded by explaining that we care about the school, the community and especially the kids that would show up tomorrow morning (though it was true, it seemed odd, given that it was my first time at Lightway!) and that we believe that God wants us to take care of these things. The custodian was shocked. She became excited, and exclaimed "I can't believe this! This is fantastic! I'm going to tell everyone! Wait until tomorrow morning, I'll tell everyone!"

We don't do these things for worldly praise, but it occurred to be at that moment that our small deeds to not always go unnoticed. Even if these acts go unnoticed by the world, they are surely not ignored by God. This small, 15 minute project had a incredible impact. Lightway puts their faith into action, and it's being noticed by the community!

I hope that this small story is an encouragement to each of you - that each of us will consider how we can put our faith into action! Little things - even things that take very little time can have a huge impact. Take a minute this afternoon to do something - write a note, pick up some trash, volunteer to help a neighbor, visit someone who is ill or shut-in: put your faith into action!